Lonely Over Bad Relationships
As a single woman, it can be hard not to focus or obsess about wanting a husband. To be honest this is actually one of the biggest places many of us single women struggle as it can be very lonely at times. Especially if you were raised around women who lived, breathed, and found their identity and significance through being in some sort of relationship. Let’s chose loneliness over settling. The good thing about the latter choice is that there is hope out of your loneliness but a bad relationship could cause you months, years, or even decades to leave.
Take Away the Lessons, Not the bad apples
Often times we find ourselves in the same footsteps as our grandmothers, mothers, aunts, or those who modeled what a relationship should look like. And if we are honest, many of them didn’t have the best relationships. There are actually a lot of women who have sacrificed a lot to be in relationships or even marriages that in many cases were not right for them. (Hand raised.) I remember those bad apples and I’m sure you do too. Good thing we were able to take away the lessons and not the apples.
This has been a big part of my experience, and many others. I think that there are other single women who would say “Drita, I can truly relate”. Our lives are not always the perfect, clean, happy, stories that bring warm sensations. Some of us have Hero stories about how we made it out of the fire. Some of our stories contain graphic details and traumatic experiences.
And if we are honest, some of our upbringings taught us to settle. Some of us single women don’t come with a wonderful packaged back story but one full of battles we had to overcome and a strong desire to do and be better. Singleness is not a bad thing and with the proper knowledge, tools, and perspectives, I wholeheartedly believe that it can be an absolutely amazing experience.
Obsessing over Men
KJV- Proverbs 18:22 – Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing,
It saddens me watching almost every post on social media obsessing over having a man or being in a relationship. I am convinced that most women who can only see the joy in having a man most certainly has not taken the appropriate time to see who she is or appreciate having herself. When have you looked in the mirror and smiled with gratitude for being YOU? Think about all the things that God has delivered you from. Take time out to get to know who you are. You are a strong, beautiful, talented women with gifts that God is ready to birth BUT until you see and understand this amazing woman the more you will look for her inside of others.
Even if obsessing about a man is not your struggle there are things that you can do to become content while making the most of your singleness. Remember, we are most content when we know who we are, what they want in life and have a solid foundation in our identity, dreams, ambitions, goals, and are prepared in key aspects of our lives.
Thank you for joining me for our Singleness Chat. Click the link below that goes into the details on “The 6 Things you can do in Singleness”. Also if you haven’t already, join the ” Purpose Tribe” with other women who want to be content in their singleness, get unstuck, and access their God-given purpose. Click Facebook Group Below: